Friday, November 11, 2005

Unavailable

So, it's 9:30 friday night and I'm on my own; writing my blog with the animals for company. Is this deja vu, or is D working a lot of late nights? Actually I guess last night was the quarterly manager event. And tonight they're having some crisis at the hotel; the phone computer and the front-desk computer are no longer communicating. Are they together? Have they fought? D must stay and play computer-system marriage counselor until the hotel is running smoothly again.

I spent a lot of time today on the aquarium, changing the water, vaccuuming the gravel, changing one filter and scrubbing the walls. We've really let it go to a certain extent re the cleaning. Cats and dogs are so good at telling you what they need; to go out, to eat, to have their litterbox cleaned. A fishtank just gets gently greener as the algae takes over. I ordered a bunch of new plants last night on the internet-- no idea how that's going to go. Live water-plants through mail-order...hmm. Earl seems okay today, his fin is out and he's swimming around but that could just be the shock of the Giant Hand reaching in, removing the classy decorative castle, and cleaning. I'd swim away from that, myself. I'll keep changing the water every other day and scrubbing the tank until we're in the clear again.

Had dinner at Cafe Amore with KK after taking our dogs to the dog park and had a thought-provoking conversation about availability. Guys love her, they all want her, partly because she's really hard to get. I don't mean that she plays hard to get in that obnoxious girly way, just that she's both really busy socially and she's really picky. One of my friends in Vermont was like that; guys just fell for her, always. Anyways, KK's dating this guy but she's a little turned off by his constant availability. We're all attracted to people who are more elusive, why? Is it because having a life is attractive, that it indicates a well-rounded, interesting person? Is it that we like people who have a seal of approval from others in the form of a busy social network, in the way that guys with girlfriends look cuter?

I was at a party last year after a Saturday night waiting tables. I just wanted to relax and have a drink before going home; I didn't know most of the people there. I was just resting in a lawn chair, drinking a beer and playing with the host's dog, chatting a little with him (the host not the dog) and with the guy next to me, who liked to travel. This guy and his friend decide that I'm really cool, that I'm more interesting than the other girls there who are running around, squealing and giggling. They can't figure out why though. I know why. It's because I'm not interested in them. My sweetie is at home fast asleep, and I'll be seeing him soon. I'm not flirting, not trying to be attractive, not trying to maintain their interest. I'm basically completely unavailable to them, which paradoxically is attractive. The funny thing is that if I were single it would never've worked. heh. Human nature is a bitch.

3 comments:

Benjamin said...

I'm sorry, Mara. I would have commented on your blog earlier, but I was unavailable. Does that mean I'm elusive and desirable, too?

But, yeah, I know what you mean. Seems it's easier to find willing mates when you've already got one. People can sense desperation. It's best to be happy being alone before you try to hook up. Sort of like finding a job is easier when you're employed. It really is weird. Sort of like the way fledgling musicians can barely afford to buy their instruments, but if they make it big, people GIVE them free guitars, drum kits (whatever) if they'll simply pose for an ad. Success breeds success. It's getting started that's a bitch.

Mara said...

yep yep yep.

The perversion of human nature.

Mara said...

I wish I could! I have no funds for travel. I forgot that you saw Cathy as a kitten!