Wednesday, September 21, 2005


This time of year makes me feel so homesick, if that's the right word, for Vermont. I grew up here in Texas, land of heat, Republicans, trucks and Cowboys fans, but after living 2 1/2 years up there, there's this achey feeling in the fall when Texas feels too flat and boring. Stale. I miss the lake, the kids in dreadlocks, the anti-Bush protesters, the weather--why can't we do crisp and cool and windy here? There's nothing like a stripey wool sweater to keep you warm instead of just in style. I miss the produce, the pick-your-own-everything, the farmers' markets. Even the normal grocery store up there had a produce department to be proud of. I miss the "moose crossing--beware of moose" signs every 100 feet on the road, and the fact that no road had more than two lanes--coming and going. I miss the concerned enviromentalists and my Western Herbalism class, and downtown Burlington that was 15 minutes from my house walking. I miss walking everywhere, leaving my car to hibernate in the driveway. I miss Speeder and Earls coffeeshop where my friend Becca worked, and Oakledge park where I took Alice all the time to run and run and run. That's what the picture is of. The colors in the fall up there are unbelievable: Vermont has a pre-skiing tourist industry based on showing folks the leaves. Those tourists made me feel smug, but I'd go now if I had the money. I miss my friends up there, even the Borders where I worked and the university. I even miss our creaky, tiny, impossible-to-heat-or-cool little house with all it's crooked doorways and slanted floors. In the fall you can fall asleep listening to the geese overhead; on their way from Canada, stopping over for a little while to catch their breath on Lake Champlain.

It's so boring here--you never wake up to three feet of snow and wonder where your car is under the drifts. I feel so lonely--besides D, everybody I know thinks that Texas is normal, even superior. I find myself seeking out people who've lived in New England. D tries to remind me about the winters, about the lack-of-light depression that fell on me like clockwork every year, about the lack of jobs. In September though, all I remember is Autumn.


Benjamin said...

Sounds like a lovely place. Especially the lake, the park, and the world-class produce departments! Autumn in Texas must pale in comparison to what you had up there.

Benjamin said...

And what the world needs now are more anti-Bush protesters!

Benjamin said...

But, you know, there are good things to be discovered wherever one finds oneself. You just have to look for them.

True, Texas is full of the four R's: rednecks and rich, religous Republicans. And Dallas, in particular, is just a big flat slab of concrete ...

...but there are little places, little pockets of beauty to be found.

And you've always got the bookstore!

And your friend(s) there.

Mara said...

Thanks, Ben. You'd love Vermont, by the way.

Anonymous said...

I miss you too honey! :)
It's definely fall, interchangeable rain and sun with warm days and chilly nights. I've tunneled into the closet to find my favorite sweater and all the summer fruit is virtually nonexistant at the grocery store. So I leave you with this . . . .BEWARE OF THE LEAF PEEPERS!!!

Love Bex